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WHAT DOES DESTINY MEAN????

November 13, 2012

JOHN 11:25

JESUS SAID TO HER, I AM THE RESURRECTION AND THE LIFE. THE ONE WHO BELIEVES IN ME WILL LIVE, EVEN THOUGH THEY DIE.

 Hi all my, THE-BOOK-OF-ROO peeps, I am so sorry its been ages since I wrote a blog I know, but I have some good reasons as to why that is and actually they kind of go hand in hand with what I am centering this blog on LOL (laugh out loud).
AS you all know from my last blog, I went through a pretty excuse my language, but hellish year LOL (LAUGH OUT LOUD) thats the only word I can think of to describe the year I had. But even though I had a crazy insane year I would not of traded it for anything, and when I said in one of my first blogs in the beginning of the year, that this year would be a year of blessings and one of the best yet, I meant it and I still do mean it.
Because even through the struggles GOD continued to bless me and had his hands on me the entire time, and after I wrote that last blog a few months ago, I felt the LORD telling me to take some time off of blogging and grow, so thats what I been doing these past few months, I been learning a lot about how to run and design websites and how to make and produce videos and most importantly how to write, and youtube has become my new best friend LOL (laugh out loud)
Since I think, july of 2010 GOD has put the word DESTINY on my heart, what does the word destiny mean?? and do we even realize the importance of that word, do we even comprehend what that word means or how strong of a word that is???
Over the past year or longer I have been trying to understand how strong that word DESTINY is and why GOD had laid that word on my heart so deeply.  The Lord really knows how to make me laugh, during this whole time of the LORD laying that word on me, I found out Beckah Shae, and yes im bringing her in to the picture once again LOL (laugh out loud), I found out she was releasing a new CD and the name of that CD would be called DESTINY!!!!
So I decided to make a video about two songs she did on the destiny album the songs are called, are you ready?? and of course the other is called DESTINY and is what the whole album is based on, so please watch the video along with reading this blog or you wont get the full effect of what im taking about LOL (LAUGH OUT LOUD).
So what does destiny mean? Well I think it depends on the person, but heres what the definition of the word destiny is.
It says: it is a predetermined course of events.  So heres what I get out of it, yes GOD holds our destiny, but we determine our steps, which than determines what GOD does.  Proverbs 6:32 says:   But a man who commits adultery has no sense; whoever does so destroys himself.
When we read that scripture we mostly focus on the fact that they are talking about committing adultery right? Well for today I dont want you to focus on that word, or the fact that they even said the word adultery, I want you to focus on the fact that they are talking about a choice man is making and how that one choice can interfere with their destiny.
In a way think of it as a choice between good and evil, GOD says a man that commits adultery has no sense and whoever does so destroys himself, destroys himself!.  Can you believe that one wrong decision in life and you can literally destroy yourself??
The point im trying to make is that people take choices in life for granted, but our choices are what makes us. People my age always give excuses and when they make the wrong choice they say: oh well im young, or im just having a little fun, or the best one I have heard them say is, im trying to find myself.  Hearing that kind of crap kills me, because its not that easy or that simple your choices effect your future, your destiny.
Even the small choices in life can affect our destiny, its time we wake up and stop taking advantage of our lives and start really thinking about the choices we make in our lives.
Philippians 3:18-19 says:  For, as I have often told you before and now tell you again even with tears, many live as enemies of the cross of Christ.  Their destiny is destruction, their GOD is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is set on earthly things.
Dont be like this, stop setting your minds on earthly things, life is to short for that, set your mind on the destiny GOD has for you, not man.  I been hearing so many people lately complaining about the future of our country and how they think one man can just destroy everything we worked so hard to build, Christians are the ones saying this kind of stuff and it is devastating to me, because if we are “SAVED” ( a Christian) than are we not covered by the blood of Jesus? isn’t that why Jesus died for us to protect us from this kind of thing?
Listen I dont know the president personally and so I dont know whats in that mans heart and either do any of you, there are many, many evil people in this world, im not saying the president is one of those people, but lets just say for a minute that he is, ok than what??? do you really think that one man can change the course of our destiny?? no only GOD and our flesh can change the course of our destiny.
Stop living  in fear!!! I always say life’s a battle so fight, and just for the record, I actually am for president Obama,  but the president does not own us or our destiny, so again ill say shut up and stop your whining and live your life to the fullest and live it joyfully Because as a child of GOD we can make a difference just as much as the president can.
Which brings me to my next point, what have you done in your own life to make a difference in this world?? what have you sacrificed?  No matter if you agree with Obamas decisions and choices or not, you can not deny that man and any other man that has gone before him has not sacrificed their lives to make our country the best it could be, may be they have stumbled along the way a little, but dont we all?? Oh but Jackie hes the president he should know better, no hes a human being just like the rest of us, he has flaws just like the rest of us, he has scars just like the rest of us, he bleeds just like the rest of us, and why, because again hes a human being, thats the difference between man and GOD.
Thats why Obama is called the president of our country and the LORD is called the LORD over all things.  So may be you dont agree with everything, but hey at least the mans trying, im not saying we should all try to be president ok LOL (laugh out loud) but im saying every one of us can choose things that can make a difference in this world, but do we always do that?? I know I dont, and I think its time that changes, we need to stop being lazy and pull out that armor!!
Habakkuk 2:2-3 says: Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it.  For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false.  Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay. when I read that scripture it reminded me of when I was growing up.  You see years ago my dads dream was to start a landscaping company, and his dream was to have a tractor and a red truck and many other things that you obviously need to start a landscaping business, and at the time he had no clue how to make all these dreams come true. He was young, never finished school and definitely did not have many people in his life that could guide or encourage him, all he pretty much had was his faith and GODS word, and my mom LOL (laugh out loud). But that was enough for him, he started his business the same year I was born, which honestly that did not make it any easier. When I was born and both him and my mom realized how sick I was they could of both said hold it, we cant do this, its to risky right now, But they did not walk in fear, they did not let the shock of my birth or the many challenges we faced stop them, they still went through with it, and when they made that choice to start Alpha & Omega landscaping and snowplowing my dad carved a scripture on a plack that said.
Hebrews 11:1 it says:  Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.  And when he made that plack he than went and found little toy trucks and tractors and placed them in front of that sign and every day he looked at that sign and believed in faith that those toy trucks and tractors would become reality one day.
And you know what everything he prayed for and everything he stood on faith for and patiently waited for, GOD gave him, exactly like he wanted down to the color of the trucks even LOL (laugh out loud)
Now dont get me wrong im not saying he did all this and it instantly happened, it took years to achieve everything he achieved, but he did it, even though he had many people thinking he could not do it, he did, he started a landscaping business from the ground up.
And that landscaping business is what not only put food on the table, but is also what gave us everything we have.  Why am I bringing all this up you ask? to show you that if you stay on GODS path and follow the destiny you know he has for you, it will come to pass.
It may take years like my dads did, but it still came to pass.  I and my parents were told time and time again from the day I was born that I would never have a future or a destiny, and that I would be dead within weeks, but we stood on GODS word and his promises.
I stood on scriptures like, Proverbs 17:22 A merry heart does good, like medicine, But a broken spirit dries the
bones, or Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me and any time I felt like I was battling this disease alone I would be reminded of, Isaiah 49:16 that says this,  See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;  your walls are ever before me.
Our country has gone through so much this month with hurricane Sandy, and if that didn’t teach us how instantly our life’s could change than nothing will, enjoy life, dont dwell on it.
Proverbs 18:10 says:  The name of the Lord is a fortified tower the righteous run to it and are safe.  You all know a lot of my story and especially what I had gone through over the past winter, and it started to get very stressful as I had said in a past blog, and it came to a point where I was at a loss on what to do and I had started to question the destiny GOD had for me.
And it came to a point where I had to do exactly what proverbs 18:10 says I had nothing else left in me and all I could do anymore was just literally run to GOD and give him it all.  I remember right before that last surgery I felt so uplifted I truly did feel GOD holding me in that room.
Even though the surgery did not work out perfectly and yes I still get stomachaches from time to time, I still believe it did help in a way, I have been sick here and there, but I have not had to be admitted in to any hospital since Easter, and for me thats like a world record LOL (laugh out loud).
The past few weeks I had been praising GOD and really just trying to get my mind back on focusing on this website and you know some times when things are going really well for you and your filled with joy, the devil can try to take that away from you, and I dont know how you all believe ,that read my blogs, but I believe you can have spiritual encounters and some are good and some are bad and I think you have to determine whats, what.
And recently I was half asleep and half awake and all of a sudden I seen this ugly looking thing, that I dont even know if it was male or female, im thinking female but I dont know LOL (laugh out loud) and this thing kept smirking at me and started whispering the word death to me.
And when it first appeared it was all the way in the corner of my room and it kept moving closer and closer to me till it was standing over my bed and it went to put its hands around my neck while saying the word death and I forced myself to fully wake up and I just started praying.
And I was like ok what the heck was that about?? Even though I had experienced this creepy thing I wasn’t in fear, I prayed and the LORD started showing me what this was about, and what it was about is this.
Some times when we go to achieve things in our destiny we become crippled in fear and that is so, so sad, the devil does stuff naturally every day to cripple us, to disable us, and yes I know interesting choice of words coming from me LOL (laugh out loud) but its true there are things in every corner of our lives trying to disable us, when that devil tried to speak death over me, I could of let fear take over and I could of said oh my GOSH, am I finally dying?? but I didn’t, when that thing said the word death, I didn’t even react to it, because I knew it was a scare tactic,
I knew it was trying to take some thing that it knew I was sensitive about and use it against me and I knew to be smarter than that.  We have to be strong and know that we are covered by the blood of JESUS and no man nor devil can put fear in us or speak death over our lives ever, so next time you feel fear kicking in,  or someone starts speaking death over you, do what I did and kick it to the curb.
Ok just two fast announcements and than im done, part of my journey these past few months has been figuring out what way GOD wanted me to expand this website, and I finally received my answer.  As you all know I love writing, not just about my life but also about music, so what I am going to do is start a page where I interview different artists that have touched my heart over the years
And actually I already have three interviews started with three amazing christian artists and I cannot wait to share them all with you.  Also the second thing the LORD had been showing me is that, this is becoming not just a website not just a business not just a blog but also a ministry, and I dont mean this in a disrespectful or rude or selfish way, but building  a business or ministry can become very expensive at times LOL (laugh out loud) and so one of the things I started on here was a online store.
The LORD has been giving me different ideas over the months and my first creation is these lovely bracelets below and they say O.I CAN DO ALL THINGS and of course what that represents is Philippians 4:13 but also what it represents is the disease I am battling, which is called O.I (Osteogenesis Imperfecta) and is another reason why the bracelets say O.I instead of just I CAN DO ALL THINGS, also the reason why they are yellow, is because yellow is what most people with O.I use to represent O.I.  You can find these bracelets on the side of my home page or on my facebook page, which again is THE-BOOK-OF-ROO I also have added a link at the bottom of this blog that will bring you to the store page, just to warn you though, as of right now we only accept paypal.
The money I collect from these bracelets will go partly towards the O.I foundation or rainbows babies and children’s hospital here in Ohio.
Also if you do not want to buy a bracelet but yet feel led to give a donation to THE-BOOK-OF-ROO you can on the facebook page, just click the box that says donate, again though please be warned THE-BOOK-OF-ROO only accepts paypal as of right now.
The reason im also trying to raise money, is not only to build the site up and help other foundations, but my dream or my goal, is to one day have enough funds raised to start my own foundation,  to help others, so that is also why im doing all of this LOL (laugh out loud).
Well this is another long blog but I really hope you enjoyed it and I really hope you keep reading and following me.  Ill end with this and than ill shut up I promise LOL (laugh out loud), I was having a conversation with a friend a few weeks ago and GOD reminded me of one of the first scriptures we learn in the bible as a kid in children’s church, Do you know what it is?? its
1 Samuel  17:49  it says: Reaching into his bag and taking out a stone, he slung it and struck the Philistine on the forehead. The stone sank into his forehead, and he fell facedown on the ground.  It is talking about David and Goliath.  The LORD reminded me of this because he wanted to prove to me once again, how he wants a fearless generation.  He wants people that are small and weak in the natural, but that are huge in the spirit to get out there and fight like david.
Complaining and expressing your feelings on facebook isn’t fighting for your destiny, GOD wants you to be brave and fearless we need to be a david generation and get out there and fight for our destiny.  Anyone that knows me can tell you I have given every ounce that is in me to fight for my destiny and I will continue doing so all the days of my life.  GOD BLESS YOU ALL THANKS FOR READING REMEMBER I LOVE YOU AND AM PRAYING FOR YOU ALL AND PLEASE DONT FORGET TO SEND IN YOUR PRAYER REQUESTS TO MY PRAYER REQUEST PAGE. AND REMEMBER JESUS LOVES YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.  Below is the link to bracelets and facebook page

 THIS IS THE O.I CAN DO ALL THINGS BRACELETS

AND HERES THE LINK TO WHERE YOU GO TO PURCHASE THE BRACELETS

 https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Book-Of-Roo/151161801598843?sk=app_172876086066223

AND HERES THE FACEBOOK PAGE WHERE YOU GO TO KEEP TRACK OF EVERYTHING THE-BOOK-OF-ROO AND ALSO WHERE YOU GO TO DONATE 

https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Book-Of-Roo/151161801598843

Donate Button with Credit Cards

Categories: Beckah Shae, CHRISTIAN VIDEO'S, Uncategorized
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Comments: 12 Comments

FIND YOU ON MY KNEES

March 24, 2012

2 TIMOTHY 1:7

FOR GOD HAS NOT GIVEN US A SPIRIT OF FEAR, BUT OF POWER AND OF LOVE AND OF A SOUND MIND.

Hi all. I am sorry I have not written anything in so long, but I promise I have a good explanation as to why that is. But before I begin, let me just say: it has been almost a year since I have written anything,, so I may be a little rusty, so if I have any spelling or grammar errors, I do apologize LOL (Laugh out Loud).
OK where do I start? I guess ill start from the beginning.  I don’t know if any of you remember this, but last year, I had mentioned, I had been struggling with stomach issues, for almost four years!!! well those stomach issues had become much worse!!. I think it was a weekend in November, I had planned on going to see my favorite Christian singer and friend, Beckah Shae, in concert, and the morning of the concert, I woke up sick, with what I started calling, one of my, “stomach attacks”.
I didn’t even want to go to the concert, that’s how bad I felt, and I was a little concerned, because for some reason, I felt like this attack was worse than they had been in the past, because usually, if I fought long and hard enough, I could kind of snap myself out of it, but no matter what I did this time, I wasn’t feeling any better.
My mom had convinced me to still go to the concert though, because she knew if I missed Beckah Shae’s concert, I would have regret it. Everyone kept telling me, I was just getting sick from being so excited about seeing Beckah Shae. Now don’t get me wrong, I love, love, love Beckah Shae, but I knew me being sick had nothing to do with her
Honestly, I would get so annoyed, because that’s the excuse people, would always tell me,when I would get sick. They would say: oh you’re not sick, your just excited LOL (Laugh out Loud) , well not only do I know my own body, but I know me mentally and emotionally and I have always been very good at handling stuff mentally and emotionally, and I just knew this was never a mental or emotional issue, this was a physical issue!
Like I said, I did end up going to see Beckah Shae, and I did have a great time, even though I was sick, but it was so funny, because Beckah Shae’s husband took some pictures of us and I had on this Grey shirt, and when I seen these pictures I started laughing, because when I looked at the picture, I am so Grey that I match the color shirt I’m wearing. I will show you all the picture in my next blog LOL (Laugh out Loud).
Beckah Shae sang for half the concert, than another group of people, I think around my age, sang the other half, the group was, I think, called Praise-Apella, they are very talented people, I suggest you all pick up their CD.  Anyways during their half of the concert, Beckah Shae was so sweet, she sat next to me during the rest of the concert, but I was so sick, that it became kind of comical to me LOL (Laugh out Loud)
Because here she is in her cute little concert clothes, and I’m sitting next to her in this sanctuary, filled with all these people and all I kept thinking was, OH SWEET JESUS PLEASE!!!! do not let me puke all over this poor girls clothes and in front of all these people LOL (Laugh out Loud)
Wait the story gets better LOL (Laugh out Loud). At one point I finally whisper to her and my mom, I have to get out of here, and so my mom says: OK, and she goes to take me out, and of course once again, Beckah Shae, being the sweetheart she is, would not just let us go out there to deal with everything on our own.
She grabbed my giant wheelchair with oxygen and all and started pushing me out of the room her self and even though I was sick. I couldn’t help but laugh for a second, because as she was pushing me out, you slowly seen the whole sanctuary, especially the kids, slowly turning their heads, looking at us, like hey! what the heck are those crazy people doing with Beckah Shae! LOL (Laugh out Loud).
Even though I had been sick, and that night did not go exactly as planned, I was still very thankful and blessed, to have had that night and once again, I have to thank Beckah and her husband for being so sweet and making me and my parents feel so welcomed. I don’t mean any disrespect to any other Christian artist out there, but I truly do not think, they would have done as much as Beckah Shae did, I have met a lot of people over the years and none of them have been as kind as Beckah and her husband.
I mean really, what big time singer do you know, Christian or not, that would help walk a sick kid out of the room and try to care for them? I cannot speak for any of you, but I can speak for myself, and like I said: I have met a lot of people over the years and none of them have gone out of their way like she has.
Honestly after that night, excuse my language, but I went through HELL I kept getting sicker and sicker and sicker and still no Doctor could figure out why.  Me and my poor mother, both, spent close to three months sleeping in our living room.  I could not sleep in my own room, or bed, because any time I feel nauseated, I must have someone standing by my side to watch me, because if I go to throw up and am alone, I will CHOKE TO DEATH!!!, because of the fact that I cannot sit up. So whenever I’m nauseated mom stays up all night. She is the only one that fully knows how, and is fully comfortable handling me.
During those times I will admit, it can get a little scary for me, I am extra careful, and I know my moms the only one that can fully handle it all, so I also am the most comfortable when she’s around, and pretty much beg her to stay by my side during those times. So because of that, me and mom made the living room in to our bedroom for two or three months. Two weeks before Christmas, I started to violently throw up bile. I never even knew it was physically possible for someone as small as me to throw up as much as I did, it started to get pretty scary!!
From the end of November, to the beginning of February, I had barely slept, nor had I ate anything. So than of course, Because I had not eaten, and yet was throwing up, I instantly was becoming severely dehydrated.  So my parents kept having to rush me to the Emergency room. The Emergency room, would of course admit me, and would run, test after test after test, every time I would go, but nothing was ever showing up on those tests, actually, some of the tests were even coming out better than they had in years.
Of course because all my tests were coming out normal, after a while some Doctors started accusing me of being depressed, they said: the O.I (Osteogenesis Imperfecta) was probably starting to get to me mentally, because the disease is such an awful disease, they had continued to say: basically, that everyone with O.I (Osteogenesis Imperfecta) goes through depression, and that was probably, what was happening to me, and they suggested that I should think about seeing a psychiatrist. Basically in their opinion, I was mentally making myself physically sick LOL (Laugh out Loud).
Every time I heard that crap and that’s exactly what it was, “crap”, was such a joke to me and very offensive, because that is such a false statement, that most people with O.I (Osteogenesis Imperfecta) are depressed.  I know and have talked to many people with this disease, and they are the most positive, strong-willed, inspirational, spiritual, outgoing, happy and most joyful people you will ever meet. Most of them have the same type of personality and frame of mind that I have.
I was very blessed, because even though, I had met a few Doctors, that had accused me of being depressed.  I had an amazing primary Doctor that not only listened, cared, and believed in me, but he also trusted mine and my moms word, and opinions. No matter how insane things had started to get, he never gave up on me, he was always fighting for me.  I will always be thankful to him for everything he’s done over the years, I am so thankful GOD brought him in to my life, because I really and truly believe I would not have the quality of life that I have if it were not for him.
This sadly, was the first Christmas (ever) that I was in the hospital.  Christmas eve night, I felt one of my, as I call it, “stomach attacks” coming on, and I told my mom, Oh no, I think I’m going to be sick for Mira’s (my niece) first Christmas. Mira is my only niece and my parents only grand kid, and so to be sick on her first Christmas, was a hard one for me, because I felt like, I ruined her first Christmas, and it just made things even worse knowing, I had never been sick on Christmas before, never ever!!!, so it was kind of like awe man of all Christmases why this one?.
I was admitted in to the hospital Christmas night.  Just in the past three months, this was my third time being admitted for the same exact thing, it started getting depressing when I realized, I not only knew the nurses well that were on the main floor, but I now, was also getting to know, the Emergency Room nurses, just as well, that became a little depressing LOL (Laugh out Loud).
So after my third time of being admitted and released, with no new, news as to why this kept happening. My body had pretty much had it at this point, and I had no clue what to do, all I kept thinking was, GOD I cannot live the rest of my life-like this, because you also have to remember, every time I went through this, I was also breaking every bone in my body, from throwing up, and the worse part was, because I was throwing up and could not hold anything down, I could not even get my pain medicine down, so I also was dealing with all my broken bone pain.
Two weeks after Christmas, I was sick again, and this time, it was worse than ever before, I just would not stop throwing up!! in just a matter of six hours, I probably threw up more than thirteen times! for my little body that’s a lot.
So my Doctor, this time, I think realized, not only was this getting worse, but I think he could also tell, there was not much more my body could take, and we had run out of tests to run, so he said: OK I think its time we talk about doing an Exploratory Operation, but the thing was, even though, me, him and my mom, all agreed it needed to be done, getting a G.I Doctor or a Surgeon to agree to it, was another story!!
Because you see, they don’t even like to do Exploratory Operations on healthy people. So to do one on someone like me, they like to at least have something show on x-rays or C.T Scans, so they have something to go on, because usually when nothing shows on these special C.T Scans, it means the odds of them finding something in surgery, are slim to none. So most of the Doctors, were not willing to take the risk of surgery.
Surgery for me is a huge risk normally, because of my many health issues, and that type of surgery was even a higher risk, because where they had to go in to my stomach, is right where the tubing is to my shunt, and if they pushed to deep, they could have cut right through the shunt tubing, and there was also a huge risk of infection and so a lot of the Doctors just felt, those were all way to many risks.
So when I was admitted this last time, my Doctor said to me, if we and really, if you (meaning me) wanted an Exploratory Operation done, than we are all going to have to work hard to talk them in to it, and boy was he right!!! LOL (Laugh out Loud). That week, I seen more than four different G.I Doctors, and basically, in their own nice Doctor ways, they said: they were not touching me with a ten foot pole LOL (Laugh out Loud).
I spent, that whole beginning of the week, trying to talk these Doctors in to cutting me open, and after the third day of every Doctor turning me down, things started looking pretty hopeless again, and I remember my Doctor came in on a Wednesday night, and I remembered thinking, boy he looks just as discouraged as I feel. LOL (Laugh out Loud) and he tells us, he has one more Doctor he wants us to talk to, but that this Doctor was a surgeon, we all knew, we needed this Doctor to say yes.
After he left, a nurse who has been taking care of me, since I was like ten years old, she is more like a friend than a nurse to me. She came in to see me, because she said she seen my Doctor leave my room, so she wanted an update on what was going on, so me and my mom told her what he said, and I remember her exact words, she looked at both me and my mom and said: Oh geez, ya know, I have a feeling your going to leave this Hospital, with no new answers and your going to end up going through this all over again.
After she left that night, I started praying, and just started crying out to GOD and said: I will not accept what she just said, you have got to make a way LORD, I said: I could not live the rest of my life-like this, that I was exhausted, and that something needed to break, enough was enough!!!!!!, that night I came across this song, find you on my knees, and when I heard the words to this song, I started crying all over again, because this song was exactly how I felt.
There is a verse in the song that says: WHEN MY HOPE IS GONE, WHEN THE FEAR IS STRONG, WHEN THE PAIN IS REAL, WHEN ITS HARD TO HEAL, WHEN MY FAITH IS SHAKEN AND MY HEART IS BROKEN AND MY JOY IS STOLEN, GOD I KNOW THAT, YOU LIFT ME UP, YOU NEVER LEAVE ME THIRSTY. FIND YOU IN THE PLACE I’M IN, FIND YOU WHEN I’M AT MY END, FIND YOU WHEN THERE”S NOTHING LEFT OF ME TO OFFER YOU EXCEPT FOR BROKENNESS, YOU LIFT ME UP, YOU NEVER LEAVE ME THIRSTY, WHEN I AM WEAK, WHEN I AM LOST AND SEARCHING, I FIND YOU AT MY KNEES!
That night, of me crying out to GOD, he guided me to this CD, (Where I find you, by Kari Jobe) and it had that song, find you on my knees, that entire album ministered to me so much. After I heard that song, I still had no clue what would happen, but for the first time, in a long time, I had PEACE,,I had that kind of PEACE I always talk about, the PEACE that passeth all understanding and I knew whatever happened, it be OK, because GOD had me in the palm of his hand.
That next day, that surgeon that I mentioned earlier, that one, that would be our last hope, he came in and he was very nice, but at the same time he was partly just as against the surgery as the rest of the Doctors I had seen, but there was one difference with him, he was like my primary Doctor and actually heard, and respected what I was saying and feeling.
He said to me, listen, I know I can do this, but I don’t know why you want to go through all this for nothing, and he went on to say, what the rest of the Doctors had said, that because nothing showed on my tests, it was very unlikely they would find something, and this surgery had a long recovery and was risky for someone like me. So I said to him, well listen, if you were me, and have gone through everything I’ve gone through and if you knew this was your last option, what would you do?
Would you have the surgery if you were in my shoes? and he said YES, and I said OK, than let’s do it. That next morning I went in to surgery, and I never was so excited for surgery LOL (Laugh out Loud) seriously I had such PEACE through the entire thing, the only time I cried a little, was when my mom left the surgery room. They always let my mom walk in to the surgery room with me, because they have her lay me on the Operating table, because their even scared to pick me up LOL (Laugh out Loud)
The reason I chose 2 Timothy 1:7 as my main scripture for this blog, is because that’s the scripture, GOD kept giving me any time I felt fear starting to take over. The part I hate most about surgery, is that first five minutes, when they start putting you out, you feel so weird, and that always scares me, so that whole time, I just kept saying, the LORD did not give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and of a SOUND MIND!!
A surgery that was supposed to take a little over an hour, took almost THREE HOURS!! because guess why????? LOL (Laugh out Loud). They found something!!!! because of all the past surgeries I’ve had on my stomach, and because of the fluid in my head draining in to my stomach, and me having the tubing to the shunt there, I had a bunch, and I mean a bunch!!! of Scar Tissue and Adhesion’s building up inside of my stomach, and it was literally, choking all my organs and my intestines, and the reason nothing showed on any of my tests, is because Scar Tissue and Adhesion’s, are the one thing, that will not show up on any tests.
It also though, usually never causes trouble for people, but it was causing trouble for me, because it was taking over the little room I had left in side of me, because like I told you all before, there is hardly no room for my organs as it is, and is like trying to fit ten pounds of flour in a five-pound bag. Well with the Scar Tissue and Adhesion’s there, it was like trying to fit 15 pounds of flour in a five-pound bag LOL (Laugh out Loud)
When that Surgeon came out of the Operating room, my entire family said, it looked like he just had come out of a war LOL (Laugh out Loud). Sadly things still ended up not being easy for me, because I ended up getting an infection right after surgery and had 103 to 104 fever and I ended up in the ICU for five or six days. When I came out of Surgery I was as sick as a dog obviously, but it was weird, because I remember thinking, I didn’t even need to talk to the Doctor to see if they did anything, I already knew they had.
Even though I felt like crap, I also felt amazing, I knew the second I came out, there was something different about my stomach, but it was a good thing.  I remember the first time I ate without feeling sick, it was amazing, I even posted it on my Facebook that day, I posted, today was the first time in three years I ate without getting sick!! I almost started crying because I was so happy, all I kept doing is thanking GOD.
The Doctors have warned me, that in their opinion, medically, they know that nauseated feeling will come back, because, number one they were not able to get all the Scar Tissue and Adhesions and secondly, the Scar Tissue and Adhesions, that they did get, will eventually grow back, in their opinions, and I will be honest, I have had a few stomach-ache’s every now and then already, since surgery, but all in all, im still nowhere near where I was, and even though the Doctors are saying, it’s all going to come back.
I do not have to except that, my real Physician, is my LORD JESUS CHRIST, and he says: no weapon formed against me shall prosper and that im HEALED IN HIS NAME So I am asking all of you, my, THE-BOOK-OF-ROO readers, to please keep me in prayer and stand in faith with me, and believe with me that, im covered by the blood, and nothing can nor will it touch me.
I am so thankful to rainbows babies and children’s hospital, and my primary Doctor and the Surgeon, I don’t know if they will ever see this, but if they do, Thank you so much, for taking that risk, that no one else was willing to take, and for believing in me!!!!!! if it were not for my Doctor never giving up on me, and that surgeon for willing to do surgery, I may not have even have been here today, because eventually what would have probably happened, is my organs, or at least one of them, would have probably started failing on me, or my appendix would have burst, because my appendix was already in really bad shape.
The LORD gave me this scripture today. psalm 27:1-4 The LORD is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident. One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.
Like I always say, life’s a battle, it’s a war. The LORD never said life would be easy, why do you think the bible talks about war all the time, and describes the bible itself, as being a sword and our faith as being a shield and our salvation as being a breast-plate, because he knew how hard life would be, he knew we would be at war. but the prize we get in the end is so so worth it all.
Joshua 1:5 says: No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life.  As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.  The LORD just gave me this scripture now.  This scripture tells us, no matter the struggles, no matter the trials, no matter the pain, he is there!!!! I may have went through HELL but in the end I arrived in heaven, and GOD has turned my sorrow in to JOY BABY, AND I AM GOLD!!!!!!!!!!!
Remember we are covered by the blood of JESUS!!!!!!!!!! and nothing, nothing, can touch the blood. I never fully understood how powerful that is, up until this past year.  Because GOD answered my prayer and gave me an answer on my stomach issues, has life been perfect? heck no, the day I got out of ICU my grandfather was being rushed in to ICU, and while I was trying to recover he ended up passing away!!!
So like I said, life is not easy, the day I came home from the hospital, I didn’t even get to enjoy it, because I ended up having to go to his funeral, and technically I was supposed to still be in the hospital for another four or five days, but I explained my situation and because I live not even five minutes from the hospital, they let me come home.
So like I said and been saying, life is not easy, I know, but all the pain, all the struggles, the heartache, its all worth it. Because each and every one of us have a destiny to fulfill. Colossians 3:15 says: And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
We are his Children, we need to get back to speaking LIFE over our selves. I heard this teaching the other day, this guy said: we get to caught up in to feelings and he’s right, we need to stop concentrating on how we feel and concentrate on what we know. Like I know im a child of GODS, and I know im in the palm of his hand, and I know im worth more than GOLD, because he has made me.
I know this website is part of my calling and my destiny that GOD has for me, so no matter how weak, and tired and even sick I feel, I push myself to write and I will continue to, because I know this is part of what GOD wants of me, and I only desire what he desires for me.
OK this blogs way to long so whatever I’ve left out, ill have to put in next week I guess LOL (Laugh out Loud). I do have a few short announcements before I end though.  Number one, THE-BOOK-OF-ROO, is back in action, so please start checking the site often, there will be lots of cool and exciting things to come, Number two, THE-BOOK-OF-ROO has its own magnet, it’s actually that picture above, I’m giving them out to anyone that wants them. my goal with these is to pass them out all over, so everyone will know about THE-BOOK-OF-ROO, so if anyone wants magnets to pass out, please contact me and ill mail them to you, no matter where your from. For now I’m only doing magnets, but eventually I would like to do other things, like maybe even a shirt 🙂 Also THE-BOOK-OF-ROO is going to continue making its own youtube video’s.
I hope you all enjoy the past video’s I’ve made. Number three, THE-BOOK-OF-ROO, since I love writing about Christian music so much, I may also start a page where I talk about Christian music and may even try interviewing some Christian artists. So like I said, lots of new and exciting things to come.
WELL I GUESS THAT’S IT FOR TODAY.  I AM SO SORRY THIS BLOG IS SO LONG, BUT I HAD NOT WROTE ANYTHING SINCE JULY, SO I HAD LOTS TO CATCH YOU UP ON, BUT I PROMISE, ILL NEVER, EVER MAKE YOU ALL READ THIS LONG OF A BLOG EVER AGAIN.   PLEASE REMEMBER IF YOU HAVE ANY PRAYER REQUEST AT ALL, PLEASE DO NOT BE SHY, CLICK ON OUR PRAYER REQUEST PAGE, AND TELL US WHAT YOU NEED PRAYER FOR AND I ALONG WITH ALL THE-BOOK-OF-ROO READERS WILL BE PRAYING. WELL THAT’S IT FOR THIS WEEK, REMEMBER I AND MOST IMPORTANTLY JESUS LOVE YOU. GOD BLESS 🙂

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